Discourse embeding referer problem

I am setting up a site and discourse is rejecting the referer. I have tried all reasonable permutations of the url of the embedding site in the discourse setup.

But on the page it always displays the same blank referer error:

The site is HTTPS but everything is set up reasonably, or reasonably enough to work at least.

But no matter what I do the referer is blank.
I assumed that it was some kind of downgrade problem with the HTTPS hiding the referer but I can’t seem to work out what’s going on.

The request seems fine…

Anyone have a clue?

ps sorry for my shitty site

I was stripping referers on the page like an idiot.

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