Full steps are:
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Update for commit FEATURE: Use feature detection for showing push notification in iOS (… · discourse/discourse@8a224bf · GitHub
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Update to latest iOS developer beta 16.4
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Enable Web Push and Notifications on iOS Safari advanced settings
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Add the Discourse instance app to your home screen
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Launch from the newly create home screen shortcut
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Log in, since those don’t share cookies with Safari
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Enable notifications in consent banner or in the user profile > Notification preference page