I set up Discourse, activated my account email, why am I still constantly receiving account activation emails every so often? How to configure to solve this bug

Your configuration in this post, if it’s the same one that generated this traceback, is correct. Use that one (port 587, and STARTTLS).

Port 587 is for TLS encryption negotiated after the initial connection (STARTTLS), whereas
Port 465 is for TLS encryption at connect time (SSL/TLS).

But many providers (correctly) block port 465 because of historical reasons, so 587 is recommended.

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