May I humbly suggest http://communityleadershipforum.com/ … another Discourse-based site. It’s activity peaks and wanes but there are quite a few community leaders there to tap.
The Community Building Stack Exchange always helped me with advice or a general direction. It has a lot of answered questions already similar to what you are looking for.
I also suggest checking out items related to conflict management (books or googling should suffice).
However, if you’re a customer, then uncategorized would probably be a good spot to discuss such issues if the developers wish to have feedback (if it relates to Discourse and how it works/runs).
Yes, I highly recommend the event to any community leader, especially those managing technical communities. It’s an unconference, so the content is up to attendees, but even more valuable is the networking opportunity. Since it’s immediately before OSCON and free, many if not most open source community managers attend.