That sounds ways to extreme.
I don’t think that the divorce analogy works for user preferences in this case. Irreconcilable differences only lead to divorce if the marriage becomes unworkable. The divorce option would be more like leaving Discourse for another application.
The irreconcilable differences we have here are the equivalent of amicable differences of opinion, more like agreeing to disagree. In this case, the options relate to how different users engage with Discourse. Most users stick with Discourse even when it doesn’t do exactly what we want.
In this case, I like to see everything and I’m happy to go to view Discourse several times a day. That is why I prefer the current default. But I can see that others who want to engage with Discourse more selectively would be better served by only being advised of direct interactions, i.e. notifications, or not being advised at all, e.g. users who check in on Discourse once a day - any count is irrelevant to them so they might not want to see it.